HSP as Traitor?

I’m blogging again this month earlier than usual.  Had to – after watching an episode of ‘The Traitors’!

You probably know the premise.  22 people thrown together.  Three made ‘Traitors’.  The rest – ‘Faithfuls’ – trying to identify them.  All hoping to win money by surviving till the end.

It’s a game of honesty and deceit, alliances and betrayals, teamwork and self-interest.

And all the Faithfuls have to go on – and the Traitors exploit to misdirect them – is individual behaviour.  How well or otherwise that’s perceived.

In this early episode, a couple of contestants were feeling emotional and tearful.  The more upset of the two attracted a lot of criticism at the Round Table (where people are voted out).

One critic said, “You’re just so intense”.  And another, “You’re so emotional – it’s horrific”.  Wow!

The comments stoked others.  Suddenly, there was a pack finding her behaviour strange and uncomfortable, not ‘normal’.  Her explanations and protestations were ignored.

Her deep and changing emotions were deemed evidence she was a Traitor.  They clearly meant she was lying and struggling with that.  Her big emotions = being untrustworthy.

She was ‘banished’, to use the show’s lingo.

Except – she was a Faithful.

It was a fascinating study in human behaviour.  And it brought HSPs to mind – with the focus on emotions not being welcome or understood.

So much resonated (and I wondered if the ‘victim’ was an HSP):

Being intense.  Having deep emotions.  Feeling bemused and crushed by criticism.  Not validated or believed.  Visible for the wrong reasons (difference).

Being out of sync with the prevailing majority.  In this case, sensitive in a competition where guile pays.  Judged and found ‘guilty’ by others.  Rejected, excluded and exiled (banished).

I felt a mix of recognition and indignation.  Resignation and defiance.  Frustration at what’s valued, and the power and privilege inherent in deciding what’s ‘normal’ or acceptable.

I also had a sense of kinship.   A feeling she’d recover once out of a hostile environment.  And – I admit – I enjoyed anticipating the justice to come when the pack found out she was a Faithful.

Her doubters were dumbfounded when they heard.

I smiled wryly when the person who made the “horrific” comment asked, “How could we get it so wrong?”.  And I laughed out loud when she later said, “I feel a bit emotional, to be fair”.

Delicious irony!

So, not a Traitor after all.  They better watch out for the real ones …